Builder has the wheel...

one conscious effort i have made since few months is to convince and keep training my brain, that not all my ideas are executable at the speed at which they are conceived. i wanted to simplify that into terms which i can constantly remind myself, incase i falter..

i have 2 identities living inside me , i guess each one of us have them too, the Visionary and the Builder, for a long time i thought there are phases when the Visionary should take over and some phases where Builder should. but i was wrong ; at least for my ambitions i need the Builder to step up to the plate and take over. Hence i have decided to dedicate next 36 months to bring the “Builder” out of me or atleast catch him upto the speed of the Visionary.

Here's simple chart the explain the problem, the gap has widened too much, visionary has a big mouth and stuck in feedback loop and the builder well...

when i was younger and wasnt wiser or had the knowledge i have now, i was a Builder, who was happy being Visionary for a few hours at school (forcibly of course), rest of time i wanted chaos and experimentation the raw version of Builder. Quite possibly those habits, muscle memory deviations which the Builder formed and honed during those early years gave me the edge, be it sports, creativity or just way of living.

As time grew i gave the Visionary more time or maybe the ego felt it was more important to invest in him and Builder just forgot to keep the pace. Fast forward to now – visualising, thinking , ideating just feels easy as first nature and "Doing" part just struggle to barely walk beyond a few steps. Ideas conceived struggle to take flight beyond the “excitement phase” stamina to be persistent is fleeting, the dopamine hits are small squirts of vision instead of meaningful replenishing chunks coming from Building things and memories.

i need to change that and the process is simple, Visionary needs to shut the fuck up and step back, he's allowed only few hours in weekend to speak up. the Builder has the wheels, he has forgotten how to walk – let alone run, sprint or soar. Builder needs to be confident of its capabilties. I am ready to dumb down, to let Visionary in me suffer so the Builder can flourish. its only symbolic that this is the first post of the blog and it wasnt run through any ai or spellcheck.

Made by and for the Builder, lets start building...